Dating is Miserable but it’ll get you laid

Hapiness is anyone and anything at all that’s loved by you. – Charlie Brown

I really should apologize to my readers. Lately, I've been lacking in glorious tales of psychotic dates and embarrassing blunders as I've started taking the Keane Li approach to life. I'm not dating. I'm not not dating. I'm just not dating.  I'd like to chalk it up to being extremely busy with running, friends, work, and writing (which I've actually started back up again) but a lot of it has to do with just being fed up.

There are only so many douchebags, so many annoying regrettable exes who spout hypocritical ramblings after you publicly refer to him and his girlfriend by their "super villain" names, so many bad dates, so many cases of Peter Pan syndrome, and so many instances of unrequited love one can deal with before one either starts adopting cats, referring to themselves as being a "Carrie", or genuinely not caring.

I'm allergic to cats and I always preferred Coupling as my sexual themed television show.

So yes, I've turned down 4-5 date invitations, let a budding relationship fizzle slowly into the background, and ............well:

me: I literally am starving ALL the time.
today I've had:
a banana, soy yogurt, almonds, a cliff bar, some carrots, and a turkey sandwich
STARVING
seriously ...I'm so ready to go home so I can go running then eat dinner
this is why thin women are bitchy
they're hungry all the damn time
Friend: are you preggers?
me: F*** NO
you have to have sex to be pregnant

If all my other reasons weren't enough I guess I could always just say I'm protecting my love of peanut butter.

Found at Starbelly